Taking the First Step - Again.

I've been having a rough time recently. I don't want this post to be negative but it might just be. I just have been feeling very sluggish these past two weeks. I hate to admit it but i relapsed. And i have hardly any motivation to get back up and start moving forward. I know these thoughts and feelings are from the adversary, And its hard for me to not believe them. I read over this post from my dear friends recovery blog about lies Satan tells me. All i have been hearing are lies like this..

- Your not good enough for your calling,
- You need to tell your bishop to release you.
- You will never be free from this
- You are happier when you use
- You dont need to pray
- You're prayers wont be sincere

So when all these thoughts are going through my head constantly its really hard to see the truth because i get so focused on these lies. And the funny/sad thing is i know they are lies! I know that all negative thoughts come from Satan just like Gordon B. Hinckley counsels: (also grabbed this from Bythelightofgrace.com)

How do we know the things of the Spirit? How do we know that it is from God? By the fruits of it. If it leads to growth and development, if it leads to faith and testimony, if it leads to a better way of doing things, if it leads to godliness, then it is of God. If it tears us down, if it brings us into darkness, if it confuses us and worries us, if it leads to faithlessness, then it is of the devil.

I have been isolating and i haven't wanted to be better these past couple of weeks. But i feel its time to get back up and take the first step again. Because i am not happy and  I know how i can be happy again.